My nipple is on Facebook.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
