I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
