he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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