I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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