shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Randomize
