hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
foreskin is a definite game changer
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
