Sry I called you an 8
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Buhtt sex?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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