i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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