I think im going to throw up on grandma
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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