it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
