Me too!
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize