____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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