Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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