im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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