you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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