How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I currently don't understand fingers.
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