at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
