Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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