If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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