Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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