Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
