The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Randomize
