it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Everyone says I win the strip club
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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