A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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