I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
