Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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