All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
We are all done wearing pants today
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
