Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I got inside last night via doggy door
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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