You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
