we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
