How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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