is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
