Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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