Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize