Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
