just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Your penis caused this!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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