HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
