My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
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