her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
whose parrot is this?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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