how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
i think my cat just said my name.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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