You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
