Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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