dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
