i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
