Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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