Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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