You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize