I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
