Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
