the day after is always just damage control
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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